feel your feels technique
My Feel Your Feels Technique is the beating heart of my fertility coaching. Each of the 5 steps lays the foundations for supporting your fertility journey through your feelings, how you feel and what's in your heart.
It took me years to get there, but I started to understand. It's not all about getting things done, crossing things off on a list, researching, analysing, making things happen, and pushing forward. It's also about our hearts. Feeling how we want to feel through our fertility journey is what makes our journey our own. It's what determines how we experience our journey. It's what carries us through.
Step 1: Release
We live in a society where complex feelings around fertility like fear, anger, jealousy, doubt, anxiety and hopelessness are often shunned. So we might bottle up or suppress these feelings, numb them, or let them out in small explosions then brush them under the carpet. Here we will allow ourselves to feel whatever we are feeling. No judgement, no making it pretty, no laughing it off or making light of anything. Just being with our feelings, honouring them, and releasing any stagnant energy if and when we are ready.
Step 2: Remember
Do you remember why you are doing this? Why you started on this journey? We get so caught up in the doing that we tend to forget about the why. Think back why you started. What were you feeling? What were your desires? What were your dreams? What did that feel like? Who did you share your feelings with? How did you express them? With my Remember Me exercise, we will return to those feelings, take a look at them and remember them. We will see how they feel in the present moment.
Step 3: Renew
Here we will welcome in a wave of fresh feelings. Those complex feelings may still come back but this step will bring in a new layer. We will reconnect with feelings that bring us balance and joy, from the past and an imagined future, and we will bring those feelings back to the present timeline. We will rediscover feelings we may have forgotten about, open ourselves up to receive them and play with them again. We will also develop inside and out nourishment practises, bringing them into our every day. To renew is a commitment to coping - in a way that brings us a feeling of both peace and growth.
Step 4: Reframe
Certain low-vibration limiting beliefs about ourselves may now be a part of our makeup. They may be critical or mean beliefs that drag us down, leaving us with feelings of guilt, shame or hurt that silently punish us. Here we will learn how to reframe these beliefs so that they benefit us, see us, hear us, love us, are kind to us. Reframing is not about erasing our limiting beliefs but about being aware of them and their effect on our feelings so we can watch them ebb and flow and choose to choose again.
Step 5: Reignite
This is a powerful step as it reignites the path back to the real authentic us. It puts us back in the driving seat. We decide how we want to feel. We get to go through our journey our way with our feelings and true emotions present. We get to feel how we want to feel, understanding our emotions, and feeling all the feels. At this point, we know how to put our feelings into words and express ourselves freely. We know which practices benefit us most in different situations. We show up for ourselves and our feelings on a daily basis.